I sometimes have a direct style….oh, ok, I always have a direct style unless I am working VERY hard to not. Well direct styles are usually interpreted as sincere (which I like!) and directness can also sometimes feel abrasive to others….something that I will likely need to work hard to be aware of my entire life J

I had a friend tell me a story the other day….she had asked for and received feedback from a good friend.  She wasn't sure what to make of the feedback… it was all constructive (aka, only told all the stuff that was "wrong" and stated in that way).

So, being a bit separate from the situation, I read through the feedback and noted that it was very valuable….filled with wonderful things to consider.  I could tell that feedback was given in a spirit of helpfulness….and in fact it included valuable suggestions that SHOULD be pondered.  However, the feel of the feedback was akin to a domineering mother telling you to clean your room….correct, but painful….and thus, not delivered in a way that inspires one to listen.

So, it reminded me of some of my past learnings about how to help others….and how to take best utilize feedback.

Things to consider when RECEIVING feedback:

1)      Is your feedback provider close to you?  It is true, isn't it?  We tend to be toughest on those we care about the most?  For some reason our human nature is to try to be most careful about our words and style with strangers….but when we are very comfortable with someone, we let our hair down much more readily….both the wild & fun hair….and the "bad hair day" hair.  So, you receive feedback from someone who you knows cares a lot about you.  Try to overlook their delivery style, take your own emotions out of it…..truly look for the help that they are truly trying to provide.

2)      Is your feedback provider "one of those" who simply seems to enjoy giving frivolous picky feedback?  There are some people in life who just take sport in finding small typographical errors etc.  I am sure you have met one of two of these…  I am not saying that attention to detail is not important.  There are many details in life that are VERY important to get just right.  But have you ever written a piece and sent it off for feedback….looking for something like "the message is not quite clear, can you tighten up the flow?"  or "I got the message….great perspective on the topic!"…  and instead, you receive: "I think there should be a comma after…".  So, do sort your feedback and choose which really matters.

3)      REMEMBER, REMEMBER, REMEMBER… you CANNOT please everyone.  I think it is another human nature thing.  We ask for feedback, but we really would LOVE to hear "I love it!"  Fact is, that is just impossible.  Everyone has opinions and we are all individuals who have unique experiences and beliefs. So, it is not possible for all of these individual opinions to think the way you do and to love your work.  So, if you want affirmations, ask for that and ask that people not send anything if they DON'T like it.  If you want feedback, expect a mix of responses back.  Then take that mix, and make the changes that you think are best.

That's all for now….tomorrow, I will comment on giving feedback.  The question to ponder in advance is:  When someone asks YOU for feedback are you a "critic" or are you an "innovator"? Note that both can be important societal roles….but they are different…..more tomorrow! J

Barb

I wanted to make sure that you were one of the first to hear….

Richard Leider will conducting a Virtual 75 minute Workshop on Tuesday, September 9, 2008 at 6 pm Central (7 pm Eastern/4 pm Pacific)

To find out more FOLLOW THIS LINK.

Why join us on September 9th?  Here are 7 simple reasons:

1)  You will be one of the first to get this rare experience the richness and depth of Richard Leider's teachings - VIRTUALLY… 2) Richard usually consults with large corporations and CEO's, with only a few public access workshops.  This is a rare opportunity for learning from him for 75 minutes.

3) Richard is offering it at a great workshop price…at a significant reduction from other public sessions that Richard has held. 4) Each participant will receive A copy of his latest book: Something To Live For, Finding Your Way In The Second Half of Life.

5) The workshop will include a thorough action guide tailored specifically for this session….in addition to a pdf of Richard's presentation materials.

6) In addition to live Q&A opportunity with Richard, you will be able to submit your personal questions to Richard ahead of the session.

7)  This tele-workshop will be recorded and turned into Podcasts so you can access and listen to the material and the content even if you are unable to attend the live class…or if you just want to relisten on your iPod during your commute or during a workout, etc.!

Of course, there is the additional bonus offer….to enhance your own personal growth in the second half of life…which is priceless!

Find out more FOLLOW THIS LINK.

We look forward to having you join us for this unique opportunity! Best Regards!

Elizabeth & Barb

Co-Founders, the NewPrimeTime.com www.newprimetime.com It's a midlife adventure!

Ask yourself "Are you making the most out of your second half of life? "

Are you making friends with your future?

Do you even take the time to ponder what's next?

Are your days filled with the richness of purposeful living or are you just too busy keeping your head above the chaos and worry of too many deadlines and projects to even ponder this possibility?

At the NewPrimeTime.com, we want to help you navigate the middle life transitions, understand what's happening,and prepare you for what's to come.

We believe the end of summer 2008 is the perfect time to STOP for 30 minutes, tune out the chatter, block the uncertainty, and let Richard Leider, renowned thought leader, lead us though the initial practical steps to assess your life and work.

Richard Leider is a bestselling author, one of the top 5 executive coaches in the country (Forbes Magazine) and one of the world's foremost experts on making the most of your second half of life!

Want more? Grab a java or a green tea and join Richard Leider, and Elizabeth Harrington of the NewPrimeTime.com.

…on Tuesday August 19th, 2008 at 3:00 pm PT, 5:00 pm CT. and 6:00 pm ET for a 30 minute discussion with some extra time added on to discuss some of your Frequently Asked Questions on making the most of your life in the second half of your life!

Follow this link to find out more and sign up

Did you know that based on current longevity trends, 60 really is the new midlife.

Turning 40 ? Well then you're still a kid!

According to futurist, Faith Popcorn anyway.

An end of summer check-up session led by Richard Leider, will be an extremely valuable step in your second half of life journey.This will be an excellent way to find the focus to stay on course.

You will learn more tips on how to make your midlife years the best years of your life!

Can't make the live call? That's OK-we live in a web 2.0 world and the call will be recorded and offered for a limited time but remember, you still must register, and the link to the replay recording will be available to you after the call.

You will be able to download it to your desktop, listen on your IPod or listen online-your choice and only if you register.

We are launching many new programs this Autumn season so stay tuned for more exciting news!

We would love to have you subscribe to our newsletter and podcasts. This way you will always be the first to hear about all of our upcoming events and never miss out.

Follow this link to find out more and sign up

We (Elizabeth and Barb) as you probably know are affiliated with "The Purpose Project" of the University of Minnesota's Center for Spirituality and Healing Department.  We are also working with Richard Leider to help him expand his work via the web and tele-conferences, trainings, workshops….etc.   If you are not familiar with Richard, he is one of the top 5 coaches in America, is a best-selling author and is a coach to many top executives….and ordinary people like us around the world!!

We have helped Richard set up a site which will have current content that HE has created ongoing and it has JUST been put in place in the last few days.  So, check it out!!!  ENJOY!

Go to www.richardleidertoday.com

When the podcast above loads,  please click on the play button ">" to hear our WELCOME!!!

Welcome to the new Primetime.com!

Who would have thought…

• Gas prices would exceed $4 per gallon?
• GM would ever be on the edge of rumored bankruptcy?
• Millions of Americans would sign up for mortgages for which they later would be forced to default due to increasing interest rates combined with stunted home appreciation.

That children would be the most prevalent users of cholesterol lowering drugs?

And on a brighter note, who would have thought…

• That people would adopt new technology in such a fantastic way that cell phones would become primary telephones for many?
• That many cancers would no longer be a death sentence?
• That email and text messaging would become primary forms of communication?
• That consumer video would go from movie theaters to video cassettes, to dvds, to downloads from the cyberworld in a matter of about 20 years?
  

In our hurry up, busy, busy, busy society. I wonder if we take time to realize how many things have gone from crazy idea to reality. And then beyond that, I know that most of us don’t take time to think about all the future possibilities, both good and bad that exist from either second-order effects of what we do today…..or possible innovations that simply need someone to believe in and put into action. 

Now, I do believe in practicalities. I am not the type of person who simply enjoys to dream up an unending list of possibilities….with no implementation of any in sight. However, I am an experiment of one. And I do know that when I was consumed by my life in Corporate America, I did not take time to THINK, as much as I should have…with respect to my job and with respect to my potential contributions to society. 

I read recently about a study published by JAMA with striking data. Kids at age 9 are active on average 3 hours per day and kids at age 15 are active on average 30 minutes a day. And then pile on the articles of childhood obesity and the medical issues cropping up about that. Did many see this possibility 10 years ago as technology and digital platforms became a primary play, communication, and study mechanisms for our youth? Why did we not think about the second-order effects and try to counteract them? What can we do now to change the health habits of our kids knowing that they will likely always be techno-absorbed every day of their lives? It will not be as simple as telling them to get off the computer….which has become a primary social venue for them. 

So, as we all pile on more, I think that more of us need to SCHEDULE in time to think, consider the possibilities and choose our own actions in concert with our own purpose, vocation….mission in life. On the activity level of our kids, I encourage all of us to consider ways to integrate our kids use of technology AND get them exercising more.

 

 

We have been exploring the "good life" recently. One of the primary principles of the "good life" is to enjoy a state of vitality and a sense of wellness. Most of us agree with this.  Now I am not planning on creating alot of controversy on a regular basis but this week I have been horrified to read in the press about a recommendation from the American Academy of Pediatrics. They are actively promoting the use of statin drugs for children as low as 8 years of age! This is because they are concerned about the long term implications of cardiovascular disease on children based on their poor lifestyle choices. What are they thinking? What about

preventation?  Many of you know I am a strong believer of integrative health and medicine. I do NOT take drugs first for a  (non life threatening) condition…..I look for the symptoms and then do my best to self correct and adjust. I do alot of research and keep an open mind in trying new things. I have not taken a prescription drug in 15+ years.

Now my husband has many serious health challenges and is on many drugs….and we watch and monitor and exercise a conscious

level of awareness on any looming potential problems. This is part of the critical 3 M's that midlife people, my mentor Richard Leider, speaks and writes about-    medicine, meaning and money!

Look, having good cholesterol numbers because you are healthy is not remotely the same as having good cholesterol numbers because you are taking drugs.  

It is commonly known statins are fatigue-producing drugs that activate genes that damage your muscles – including your heart.  Giving these dangerous drugs to children as young as 8 years old, while they are in the process of growing is NUTS. What has happened to common sense? I remember a top consultant in Toronto tell me years ago that common sense is not that common. Common sense sure seems to be lacking with this report!

We need to collaborate together, with our collective wisdom as parents  and grandparents, to teach good lifestyle habits to our children. It starts with us! It starts with healthy eating and MOVING our bodies away from the TV and computer screens.

Let's do what it takes to stop this madness and get ourselves and our the children in our lives living the good life!

Ahh this is my birthday week. I call it my birthday week, because I like to celebrate all week long. 

It's actually Tuesday, March 18th.

To those that are saying isn't that a little ego-centric to celebrate all week long?

My answer is an emphatic-No, not for me….

I just really like to celebrate special occasions and what better than than a nice lengthy personal celebration?

This year is not a decade changer, but  I'm really conscious of another year passing by….and that is all the more reason to celebrate!

HUH?

I am a contrarian in many ways.

I celebrate each passing year with a true sense of anticipation about all the new adventures

awaiting.

This is a time I reflect on the lessons learned and the wisdom gained in the past year.

I love early Spring…so a good thing that the two special events coincide.

I get a sense of Awakening at this time of the year.

A sense of renewal..the sun is higher, a touch warmer, the birds are chirping and the snow is quickly melting…

I have always lived in the North so

eagerly await ANY sign of the awakening of nature…

No buds visible yet…I said I lived in the North!

Now I live in the Minneapolis area

so we are far from the season of budding…..

but there is a definite sense of more light and warmth coming.

So while reviewing this year's past events, I realized that I feel wonderful.

I've lost weight, toned up, and am much more more agile and flexible.

I have really focused on making fitness my friend.

If given the choice between curling up with a good book and a crackling fire on a

numbingly cold and snowy night or piling on the parka, boots and mitts to

shlepp to the gym for a fierce work-out, well…

let's  just say the gym choice would NOT have won -until this past year.

I have often heard that it gets harder and harder to recapture our youth as the years pass by.

The question I'd like to pose to you is…

What if it never gets away with in the first place?

Sounds like a much better plan to me. 

So my birthday gift to you is, I will post a lesson learned each day this week here in my blog..

Visit each day to  learn more about the life-changing tips I learned this past year to feel years younger than I did a year ago, or  10  years ago for that matter.

Tomorrow the first tip and probably the most important.

Drum rolls puleese…

 

1.        Move more

 

 

Did you know that "running on empty can in the long run mean a shorter life-span?" 

This quote by Dr. Tracey Gaudet was on the PBS special a  year or so ago on

" The NEW Medicine."

Dr. Gaudet also said: " if you are constantly tired, stressed and overwhelmed-

you are damaging your life-even putting your life at risk."

Do we know anyone who is "tired" " stressed out" and/or "overwhelmed"?

We were striving for that  elusive thing called balance when out of the blue, today

we need a "scary times life manual"?

My sister Catherine, emailed me today with a long list of issues, some of them very valid for creating

some fear in her life.  When I asked her what she was doing to nourish herself,…she admitted that she hadn't

been to the gym for 3 weeks, was definitely hitting" the bad carbs"  and feeling even worse because of it.

She is NOT alone in handling stresss, fear and overwhelm that way.

In fact, we're being bombarded with more and more very "scary news".

The bigger question I'll be writing about is,

What Do We Do in these very scary times to not increase our risk factors of keeling over?

 

Dr. Gaudet also stated that," 90% of women live their lives disconnected from their bodies."

For many of us, we use food as comfort. We don't even know what we're shoving in our mouths-its called MINDLESS EATING.

Countless  times I've heard women say they don't even remember eating the entire bag of chips or emptying the cookie jar

 

I admit it …I've been there  more than a few times in my life! Bring it on Ben and Jerry!

Of course  by now we finally understand that mindless overeating

is usually because the person is trying to fill themselves up-they're hungry for something way beyond the need for nutrition.

Food is their "addiction of choice."

 

So ..my advice today…get to the gym or  lace up those walking shoes and get outside.

Take a deep breath, express wonder at the beauty of early Spring and become conscious

of  the way your body feels as it moves.

Let those happy endorphins work their magic. Its a good start.

More on steps to take to stave off the scary times in the next article.